His life has been the most wonderful journey my husband and I have been on so far, but it's flown by so quickly! He is about to be the age at which solid foods are normally started, and I am kind of freaking out. Why, you ask?
Well, for starters, breastfeeding is easy. I don't have to think about it at all. I know that he is getting the best nutrition possible for him. The thought of introducing foods from the thousands of choices out there terrifies me. I realize that at this age it's more about just getting him acquainted with the physical aspect of having to chew things and tasting new flavors, but it sets the foundation for his entire adult life as far as diet goes. No pressure there.
Basically, I researched everything I could about being pregnant and having a baby, so by the time I actually did it, I was calm, cool, and collected. I consider myself to be a great baby-momma, but have I given much thought to being a mom of an older infant/toddler/child/adolescent? No way. I feel like I did when I got out of pharmacy school: that at any moment, someone was going to blow my cover and everyone would know that I am a complete fraud and have no idea what I'm doing here! I really feel like I've gotten the hang of this baby thing, and then everything changes on me. Now I'm responsible for his attitudes about food from now on, and considering my own attitudes about food leave much to be desired, I'm feeling apprehensive about the whole thing. That's putting it mildly. Today I felt sad about it, then excited for a few minutes, then sick for the rest of the day. I have a burning desire to be perfect for him, to make his life perfect, and I know I will never be perfect. So there's that.
Here is my baggage: 1) I am an emotional eater. If I have an emotion, I eat. Pretty much any emotion. 2) I have an enormous sweet tooth. 3) I don't currently cook very often. 4) I haven't quite gotten the hang of stocking a kitchen properly and often find myself staring blankly into the pantry and/or refrigerator racking my brain for something to eat before giving up and hitting Chick-fil-A.
My goals for Max are: 1) I will make all his baby food. 2) It will be fresh, organic, and as close to its naturally occurring state as possible. 3) He will appreciate a vast array of healthful foods and not eat junk food. 4) I want him to have treats occasionally, because I don't want to be a food Nazi, but I don't want to go overboard. It's so easy to fall into the trap of giving food as a reward, leading to unhealthy attitudes about food later.
Basically, I want him to eat the same foods as us and not processed, sugar- and preservative-laden jarred foods...which is bad because I will have to overhaul our diets, and good because I will have to overhaul our diets. (Not that we eat jarred foods, mind you) But we could definitely eat healthier. John claims he loves vegetables, and I guess I believe him, but he never comes clamoring to me asking for them. I always saw him as a meat-and-potatoes kind of guy. Me? I eat veggies because I know I need to, but honestly, I could live off cake and candy.
I know I've got a little more time before Max will be ready for solids, but it's coming on so lightning fast I needed to fret about it now, so I can be calm about it when it's time. There's just so much to think about! I'm so tired from all of it already. And so not ready for him to grow up.
